My (25F) Husband (30M) has wanted all of my time and has become insecure. How do I set boundaries while letting him know he has worth?

2021.12.05 23:41 Most-Plane My (25F) Husband (30M) has wanted all of my time and has become insecure. How do I set boundaries while letting him know he has worth?

I am (24)F married to (30)M for around 4 months, together for 6 years.
In March of this year, my husband began having migraines that stopped him from going to work or focusing on anything. We have tried to set up disability payments through his job. I have taken the lead in this as it stresses out my husband and causes his headache to become worse. I am the only one bringing in money at the moment and we have not received a payment from his work since September. I am only a call in therefore my hours are hectic and often don't get much of a paycheck. Ever since my husband has become sick he has gotten much more clingy. He wants to spend time with me watching things whenever I am not working. Even though we have many different tastes and we usually end up watching what he likes. He only leaves to eat with his parents or he will go down to a friend's house for a few hours a day on the weekend. This comes with the expectation that I will drop him off and pick him up.
He will wash a single load of dishes or switch over the laundry. However, most house upkeep, care for the cats, and errands fall onto me. His headaches are being caused by stress so I have been trying to keep him relaxed. However I have been incredibly stressed with work, chores, finances and other things. I feel as if my husband is no longer the man I fell in love with. He is no longer goofy or smiling, instead spends most of his time on the couch playing pokemon go. He will help his father work on things all day or spend a large amount to buy something "with" his parents yet complains about his head being too bad to clean up or that we can't afford to get Christmas gifts.
A rift has been coming between us causing us to have a long conversation where I cried and told him I no longer wanted to live in his hometown and he was not the man I married. I tried to explain the old him and he apologized and got better, for a while.
Tonight we had a large fight. It was 10:30 and was usually the time my husband goes to bed. He hadn't been to his friends this weekend so we spent most of our time together. I asked him to go to bed early so I could stay up and play my game for a while. He asked why I couldn't just put in earphones and play next to him. I decided to be honest and told him it was because we've tried that and I don't want to be poked every five minutes with "watch this" "Is it bedtime yet?" "I'm tired" 'why aren't you talking to me" "Let's go to bed" "Are you done yet?"
My husband just got up and got ready for bed in silence. I asked him why he was so upset and he said "I already know I'm a huge burden and you just implied it with your rant. I'm devastated." I got frustrated and told him he was never a burden and if he wanted to be like that fine.
Tell me Redditors, how to I express my need to have alone time while showing my husband he isn't a burden?
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